When Peter was in Year 2 I began to really question who benefits when a parent is 'blamed'. I tried to think of all sorts of scenarios and to really challenge myself to think of an example of a situation where someone benefits. Sometimes I would even imagine asking a group of final year student … Continue reading The Blame Game
Month: March 2017
It is as plain as day that professionals don't have a good enough understanding of the skills and knowledge of their colleagues and the contributions that they can offer. I believe that this leads to missed opportunities that could considerably improve children's outcomes and the experiences of families and staff. I recently sat in a … Continue reading Who’s Who?
There was a lot of discussion around the post 'No Smoke Without Fire: Safeguarding Concerns'. It seems that inappropriate social care referrals is something that has happened to many and can of course be traumatising to experience. However there were also a number of comments about how critical it can be to have 'that one professional' that … Continue reading Thank you to the one that remained professional
"You must be mum." Four words that put you nicely in a box and out of the way, even when you are present in a meeting. That introduction says so much - you know you are simply there to be tolerated, to tick off a requirement and that you are expected to sit in the … Continue reading I’m not “mum”
By Rosie and Jo's mum. It took me a while to get my head round these two ideas: 1. My daughters can be enjoying activities that they have chosen to engage in, want to carry on with and benefit from in many ways while still feeling stressed and overloaded by them. Playing with friends at … Continue reading Even good experiences can contribute to overload.
I'd have been the same. I would've thought “I bet there is more to this story, a whole 'other side.' There will be something legitimate that triggered the Social Care referral, I bet." That is, until I read the contents of Peter's school and local authority (LA) files. To say it was interesting is an … Continue reading No smoke without fire? ‘Safeguarding concerns’
A short post from a parent who attended the Whole School SEND event at the end of February. My friend and I were delighted and grateful to receive tickets from The Special Needs Jungle to attend this event. Our expectations were that we would be able to understand more about SEND provision from the point … Continue reading Thank You Whole School Send
By Rosie and Jo's mum I think many of us have been in the position where another adult believes that they know our own child better than we do. Often this is a member of our extended family or school staff. So why should I be recognised as the expert in my own child? I … Continue reading Who knows my child best?
It really isn't. Fixing famine in Africa is complex. Understanding a school budget and notional funding should not be seen as/talked about as complex by those in a graduate professional with access to finance advice. So please stop hiding behind poor information and a lack of transparency. The unspoken message here is 'we can't do … Continue reading It’s Not Complex: A Mini-blog
Below is a summary of a conversation that I had with a close friend last week. Of course I have removed all emotion: crying, hyperventilating in panic and so on. Fearing for your child like this brings with it intense panic and fear. After months of barely managing, of pleading for help, assessments and a suitable school placement … Continue reading Abused by the Local Authority
By Rosie and Jo’s mum This is a description of a meeting I recently attended at Jo's school. For an hour and a half, I set round a table with a group of people, care, education and therapy staff, who worked on three basic principles: A child will make progress if you remove the barriers … Continue reading A School With a Helpful Approach
"I trusted this member of staff to help me when I was feeling scared and then I saw her holding the door shut one day. I could hear a kid screaming inside. Then I was confused because I had trusted her and I didn't know if she was nice anymore" It has come to … Continue reading Restraint and Seclusion: A Mini-blog
Whether we are managing behaviour in our own homes or dealing with the fallout from behaviour management in school, the mantra ‘All behaviour is communication’ can serve us well. I will be forever grateful to the parent I first heard this from. Parenting two children with complex needs has made me rethink my approach … Continue reading Behaviour Management: A Mini-blog
This Situation The open secret that teaching staff can decide that the conclusions of an 'expert' about a child's specific difficulties are wrong, without following any agreed process, became well publicised over the last week. So what 'should' we expect from the professionals that we entrust our children to every day? Examples of the types of … Continue reading Disagreements over ‘diagnosis’: What should happen next?
By Rosie and Jo’s mum Both of my girls have found school difficult. They have both spent long periods unable to attend and they have both experienced severe anxiety as a result of inadequate provision. When things weren’t going well, which has been often, I have strongly considered home education. Both girls are academically able … Continue reading Shouldn’t it feel like a free choice? Why I don’t home educate
Have you found that raising concerns mysteriously becomes the cause for concern? Tonight, my children were discussing small scars and yet another memory flashes back into my head. Peter talks about the time he used a blunt pencil to make a hole in the back of his hand whilst at school. He did it so … Continue reading When Teachers Deflect Your Concerns: A Mini-blog